Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Make it (and by 'it' I mean 'Dave Brandon') stop

Unsurprisingly, Michigan will be wearing UNIFORMZ in the Outback Bowl. Unsurprisingly, said UNIFORMZ will be the worst things ever since Michigan's alternate unis are required via the Adidas contract to always be the worst things ever.


Sigh. The details don't even matter anymore; I have no interest in trying to parse out whether these are the exact inverse of the terrible unis from the Alabama game or whether I'll actually be able to see yellow numbers on white jerseys or whether the helmets are tolerable.

As of the Outback Bowl*, Michigan will have worn eight different uniforms over the last two years. Eight. Eight! AAARRRGHGHGH. Basically everything that makes Michigan Michigan has been sold out in the name of selling some terrible, awful, no good, very bad jerseys, presumably to people who don't really care about whether Michigan is Michigan. I mean, what better way to build a brand than by doing everything possible to appeal to the people who don't care about the things that turned the brand into something meaningful in the first place and in the process doing everything possible to alienate the people who do? Wooooo business!

Michigan has arguably the best, most recognizable uniforms in existence. Wearing them would be f#%$ing swell. The end.

*Michigan is the designated home team and thus had the option to wear the blue jerseys that are, you know, identifiable as being Michigan's. Instead, these. HEAD ASPLODE.


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